Dave has been given his big chance.
After years of tugging everyone's
sleeve apologetically, offering his
unsolicited insights into the mind
of their characters, worrying himself
sick over text and delivery, all the
while blanking on stage, he can now
everyone agrees that the nickname
he was given over a decade ago fits
perfectly, Director Dave, "DD" as
we like to all him, has labored very
hard the last year or so stabbing
everyone in the back, while sincerely
telling them so-and-so would never
work with them again. Eventually,
everyone else in contention estranged
themselves from the Spare Parts, and
those who didn't resorted to confidential
phone calls to the Police Narcotics
Hotline, the doors swung open.
next problem, casting. After bugging
the shit out of every past cast member,
some major stroking needed to be done.
Patrick was easy, being Dave's younger
cousin there were plenty of skeletons
within arms length. Brandon just needed
the promise of beer. Jill, come on,
we all know how gullible she is. Heather
had only worked with DD on one other
occasion and it was a large cast,
five years ago. Amanda, well, she's
never worked with him, and if rehearsals
keep going the way they have, never
will again. Leslie, although never
finishing college, did accumulate
a few credits taking psychology classes
before dropping out. So after noticing
how DD displayed certain typical neurosis
when in the presence of his brother
and sister, he came to the conclusion
that if she incorporated some of his
siblings' mannerisms an advantage
could be had. Being a redhead, just
like the brother and sister added
the final touch. Needless to say,
Leslie has never had a problem with
Dave. Actually, he amuses her.
now Dave, it's time. Step up to the
plate! Put up or shut up! What's that?
Give you a break?! Come on! Where's
all that intuition you're always saying
you have?! Don't just sit there with
that stupid look on your face! Let's
GO! Get out of that fetal position.
Show us, the untalented ones, how
it's done. Ok, ok, Leslie, give him
a hand. Ellen, could you get a mop
please? He left a puddle.
what were you thinking?